Problems with dating a widower
As a follow-up to our article, here are more thoughts on navigating the often tricky waters of dating someone who is beginning to date after grieving the untimely loss of their partner or spouse – from Members of our own Widow/Widowers community here on e Harmony Advice, in their own words.As you’ll see from the passages below, everyone’s reaction to their circumstance, opinions and experiences are going to be different, so it’s important to keep in mind the specific needs of your match as you progress.As things are becoming more serious, we have begun to talk about marriage.I am a 32 year old woman who has never been married.I’ve also corresponded with hundreds of women who have fallen in love with men who claimed to be ready to move on but, in the end, were not.Most of these women could have avoided heartache if they’d been aware of the red flags.My W is very open about his late wife and their life together.
As a widower who has since remarried, I’ve seen too many men (myself included) start dating before they’re emotionally ready to make serious commitments to the women they claim to love. I wrote earlier about how her husband and I began a relationship just a few... It is so hard hearing how 'wonderful' the late wife and their life together was and I am the one who has to be sympathetic and understanding when he is sad, which he is happy to tell everyone about. I'm feeling a little scared and vulnerable about it at the moment. A little over a year ago, I met widower, 56, whose wife died four years ago after an 18-month battle with cancer. I wrote a few posts (less than five) about my experience dating my friend's widower. She quite suddenly and tragically died while giving birth to her second child. though I'm open and willing to see where it takes me. Their father and I share joint physical and legal custody.I also personally know many other widowers who are happily remarried.We know how fortunate and blessed we are to have someone with whom we can spend the rest of our lives.
My widower and his wife had a wonderful 18 year marriage and I know that the grieving process was a difficult one, and still continues to the this day.